Do you identify with being a conscious or evolved woman? If so, you’ve probably seen the enormous amount of articles and social media posts from all over the world about what women are asking men to understand and ‘step up’ to. Although this may be warranted in some ways, it also reveals a collective feminine shadow that I want to highlight here. There really is something many ‘evolved women’ are missing. I have seen it in my students, friends and also in myself – until I realised this really important thing.
And you’ve likely seen the metaphysical teaching that you must be the vibrational match to what you want in relationship. It’s true, yet what does that REALLY mean on a practical level? I cannot speak for everyone, however a huge amount of women I know and witness online are unaware of what it actually takes to close this gap. Without really getting this, you might continue to feel disappointed, frustrated & be blaming or complaining about men.
My most popular article so far which gained over 3.6 thousand Facebook shares in just a few weeks, is called, ‘Stop Being In Relationship With His Potential.’ It was inspired by the many women I have mentored over the past year especially and also from this very clear statement from author Graham R White: ‘men grow through pressure not support.’ And he doesn’t mean the kind of pressure from you vocally telling a man what all his issues are – because that is disrespectful to him & a waste of your time (unless you are his therapist, mother or close trusted friend).
Graham is referring to the natural pressure that happens when a woman lives by her own internal standards. This is a huge part of what it means to be a vibrational match for what you want. It is of course an inside job. However to generate that from the inside takes quite a bit of sincere attention and inner development.
Check out the video interview I did with Graham on this subject.
Photography by Juan Monetti
To activate this upgraded version of yourself, it means really committing to yourself so the attention required to really evolve is actually happening. It often means releasing trauma, resolving past boundary loss, learning the value of transmuting your emotions in sacred space, actually really feeling your own feelings (often easier said than done) + more, to cultivate the genuine self respect needed for your own wholeness.